I don’t have a problem with people in Alcoholics Anonymous who have problems. Hell I’ve got problems my damn self. I have problems with people in Alcoholics Anonymous who try and make it look like I’m the one with the problem -when in fact there the one with the problem. I talk program! The only problem is 🤔 a lot of it’s not in the book – Because as Bill W. so quaintly put it, “More will be revealed”. And that just so happens to be the case in my case -along with many others who have been around the rooms.

Some people simply do not want to live a life of servitude -real or in their own mind. So, we all have a choice; live better than alot of others do (and possibly take from the mouth of another and their family in the process) or not.

From a spiritual perspective some would say that those who live a life of of excess have little or no Faith that God will provide for them day-to-day. Alot of people live by the philosophy that:

•I had to do everything for myself -so let other people do for themselves

These people have little or no conception regarding how blessed they are and the idea of passing it on. Furthermore, Too much is never enough in their own mind! The sky could fall tomorrow 🤔, or they may need open-heart surgery next week… or their grandchild could get sick…

I myself have a bad habit of stockpiling stockpiling food in the fridge and leaving it in there even though some of it goes bad. The illusion that there’s plenty of food in the refrigerator… 🤷‍♂️

Some people never learn to say no. And some people never learn to say no thank you.

Would it really make that much of a difference if you lived somewhere else -I mean in your particular case? I’m not sure how much of a difference moving elsewhere (back to Cali for example) would make in my particular case. That’s why I ask 🥱

What if somebody wants to die? What if somebody wants to go to prison? Then it’s not really a punishment is it 😄

Like when you want to tell a defiant child to brush their teets -you tell them not to, right? Riiiiiight… 🤔

If sex is not allowed in the prison system -then where do you put gay offenders? Putting a gay man in a male prison system is like putting a straight man in a female prison system! Putting a gay woman in a female prison system is like putting a straight woman in a male prison system.

When we’re younger we want to be older; when we’re older we want to be younger 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♂️

Some of us from a very young age become mindful of their latter years, financially, physically… the whole she-bang! I for one, never gave much thought to preparing for my latter years. Maybe I never thought I’d live that long -maybe I didn’t care -maybe I didn’t know how -maybe I never cared to learn? But, while some people take care of themselves so their quality of life is extended, they, in many instances suffer a similar fate as their peers -only later in life (postponed suffering).

Earlier in my writings I would envision envision aspire shaped net shaped net with points containing each writing – And eventually all these writings filling in those points points and creating one big connected truth truth made up of little truths.

And perhaps my thirties I was very surprised to find that a lot of people my own age knew very little about very little about how they felt about certain things. Important things – tith little or no idea whatsoever. 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️

One of the things that made me fall in love with Alcoholics Anonymous was a reading from the book “Pass It On” written by Bill Wilson. In one of the chapters, Lois Wilson, Bill’s wife, shares some of her family upbringing. She speaks of how she was taught from a very young age that when you have a squabble -or a disagreement with those you love, You never let the sun go down without having made some sort of peace between you. I suppose a lot of these sorts of things were missing in my childhood.

You peer into a crowd of people and you wonder 🤔, just how many people in that crowd have committed serious offenses against people they know, people they love. And then, just how many of those offenses have gone unclaimed by the perpetrator – because, you see, I DO NOT believe a soul ever finds complete until it has made peace!

A lot of things I still get blindsided by that I should have seen coming a long time ago -and still don’t. Like my blow up with Ana the other night -should have seen what instigated it before I even got “the call”.