You have to either be open or a certain kind of closed if people are going to take an interest in you and hold it. I have seldom been either.

With regard to most people, you could say that the selection of a potential partner involves and she’ll partner involves a certain amount of self centeredness. In fact this notion is so deeply embedded in most of us that that to consider otherwise would it would nullify the point altogether. But how is that working for you [so far]? What do you suppose it is that people learn later than life rather than sooner, that makes their relationships tenable? Perhaps even genuinely worthy of being called a “relationship”.

If going South after a traumatic event is a choice -then why not [choose to] go North [instead]?