There is always atleast a grain-of-truth to be found in every one of these posts. IN EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM -I GUAROOOON-TEE IT! 😉

Well if that’s the mentality moving forward (with regard to the problems of modern-day America…) I guess we’re all screwed!*

*May as well throw in “Can’t fight city-hall!” while we’re at it!

What I never heard in counseling calm that is until this last go round recently. With all my complaining and criticizing of the world around me… “You’re right, you do need all these things that are lacking in your life -and you are right to feel the way you do”.

Remember how they were telling parents that it’s not the amount of time you spend with your children but the quality of the time you spend with them -to appease concerns (guilt) regarding the wave of two-income families that came into effect in the late 70s…? 80s? Well now we know that’s bull…. When I started counseling the big thing was Bradshaw’s homecoming and self-parenting, self-nurturing… There is probably a lot of validity to all event. A good balance for any human being is the right amount of self love, the right amount of other love, and the right amount of godly love. But I never heard anybody in those counseling sessions early on talk about the necessity of love of others and the necessity of love of God. If you take those two experiences as a whole, one could argue:

•There was justification, if not prompting for the breaking down of and down of the family in the late seventies, eighties…

•And the same could be said of the breaking down of the social ties in America. “Who needs other people, I can love myself”.

In both instances, has America become better, stronger based upon this reasoning? I do not believe so! Have our children become better adults and members of society as a result? Have we become stronger, more cohesive as a nation as a result of these philosophies/theories? Again, if I played the devil, and my aim was the break down and destruction of mankind, this is what I’d be whispering in your 🦻(hearing-aid)*.

*America’s still the best country in the world – Being the best isn’t necessarily saying much these days! How long are we gonna ride those coat tails?

** When our grandparents and great grandparents started saying “What’s wrong with this new generation?” We really should have stood up and took notice! In a way they did it to themselves though. The people that came out of the depression and World War II, and vowed their children would never suffer the same pangs. They took away the very things that made them the people that they themselves were proud to be! 🤔 …and 👹 scores again!!!!!!

As difficult as this may be to fathom -God still has a perfect record!

I remember the evening very clearly. I was riding around with my cousin Tony and his friend Gary in the back seat of gary’s Fairlane?The boys were up front putting them down and joking about as young men often do. And all of a sudden I came to the realization that I was going to die! That life on this planet as I knew it, and all the experiences would someday seize-along with me. It scared the hell out of me for the hour-and-a-half or so. I’m not quite sure what all that was about. I’m not sure if it’s a common thing to all human beings -I only know what happened to me at that age.

Sidenote: The thought came to me a number of years ago that alcoholics being self-centered in the extreme, highly intelligent… The thought of their own mortality’s got enough to drive anyone to drinking. 🤷‍♂️

Sidenote #2: Alcoholics have a tendency to use a magnifying glass in many of their situations. We take certain things of our own choosing, and and magnify them. We take certain other things, turn the magnifying glass around, and minimize them. One of the hardest things in the world for an Alcoholic to do is see things right sized. The two hardest things for an alcoholic are to do the next right thing and do nothing at all.

Sidenote #3: A lot of people in the world suffer through traumatic experiences both as adults and as children. Using the metaphor above regarding the magnifying glass… While in counseling 20 some years ago, or perhaps doing 12 step work with my sponsor -Granville (a notable mention -post-mortem), I began to think what it must be like to deal with such issues as molestation, physical abuse, Alcohol parents, abandonment, trying to form one’s identity moving from home to home, city to city, state to state, trying to acquire a consistent set of values and beliefs and based on so many different ones (oh, lettuce not forget diet)*. In any event, trying to see the reality of, behind all these events and with an Alcoholics’ brain which has aversion towards the aforementioned… All I can say is that it took a hell of a long time to put Humpty-Dumpty back together again -decades! Well I guess I could add one more thing lol -people like myself in Alcoholics Anonymous who fail to stay sober…. I don’t blame them one bit!

*I think one of the worst things that ever happened to me as a child was living with grandma and grandpa heard. They’re standard of living in quality of life was so high that everything and everyone else seemed to pale. I think most people are lucky to know that they are not necessarily well off or bad off by living under one roof they’re entire childhood. Perspective was something that was thrust upon me very early in life.

Sidenote #4: I know this may sound crazy -but I sometimes get the notion that satan had it in for me. That he foresaw the development of “this reaching out to and imploring of others”. I had a very interesting conversation with a brilliant gentleman by the name of Ramon some 24 years ago. He said the molestation that took place with my cousin was in part due to my powerful presence in his home. All of it, the molestation, the meanness… All designed to counter, to neutralize, to disrupt, eliminate… … What did I know, I was 4 years old. And what do I know looking back? It was just a perspective I had never considered to that point. One other rather profound experience I had with Ramon was that at about 7 years sober, beleaguered sense-or-worth and all -in some of our discussions together, Ramon started building me up and telling me things I’d never heard from another human being before. It changed forever my outlook on who I was -it planeted a seed in me that has continued to grow, and flourish to this day. God always gives us what we need – and He is always on time!

You begin to recognize not only your own mortality, but the mortality of those around you as well as that of the experiences in life you will have… Some figured out sooner while others later. I think it’s a grave mistake in life to start experiencing this attitude. How much we take for granted until we gain in this wisdom.

Let’s play a game called… Well let’s just play it! When was the 1st time you…? When was the last time you…? When do you think will be your last time….? Very few people people go through life saying they didn’t spend enough time at the office -and as humorous as that sounds, even fewer people go to their graves with a sense of fulfillment or satisfaction regarding the things, the people the loved most.

Sidenote: This came to me a very long time ago. Most times we regret on our deathbeds things we fail to regret in our hey•day. Why don’t you make a list of some of those things now, and get after them! Hint: Pride

A lot of people don’t know what’s good for them -let alone what’s best. But try telling them that! 🤷‍♂️

These is extraordinarily difficult, and delicate subject-matter on the site. And while I cannot argue against the offense some will take towards certain views, or statements -I can say with absolute certainty that the motivation(s) behind them are benign in nature. Yes, it is true that with regard to certain some of the subjects I am deeply passionate about, protective of -even biased towards -even prejudiced! Now those are two words that will raise “red-flags”, even impregnation.

I can give you a line I have spoken numerous times in meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous that will basically sum up my feelings about these blogs -and therefore, my motivations! “The only real issue I have ever had in a meeting are rude people (a-holes) and people giving out wrong/bad information (it’s a life-and-death ordeal). Prejudice? Bias? Yes -against anything that harms humanity. Physically, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually… Am I this great person on a crusade? More than likely, I am simply a regular person who has been subjected to many cruelties of the world -a person with something of a flare for the verbos coupled with great zeal for vengeance (against the true causes of those injustices perpetrated against me -and others of “my kind” (that would include everyone).*

You say “things that are harmful” is a purely subjective or personal thing”. While I agree some things effect some people more than others -perhaps even in different ways. There are even people in the world who are diametrically opposed to certain things while others appear to show enormous zest or zeal for them. Let me just say this, it’s often a long road (and in some cases a very short one) in life that helps to shape our attitudes and feelings towards things, possibilities in the world around us (and their effects on us). Just because something feels good doesn’t mean it’s good for us. Just because something doesn’t feel bad doesn’t mean it’s not bad for us. Just because someone tells us it’s OK to do something doesn’t mean it is. And just because somebody we trust or revere does something, doesn’t mean we should trust or revere their choices. One thing about man is that he has always had his own mind -for better or for worse. Many people often choose their own way -as opposed to the best way! I can give you some Philosophical idioms:

“The good (and certainly the worst) is often the enemy of the best”.

“All is permitted, but not all is beneficial”.

“To the insane, sanity seems insane”. (God told me this some 27 years or so ago).*

*Now here’s the kicker: if a person isn’t quite right:

•Prone to self-destructive tendencies (however seemingly harmless; smoking, poor diet, little porn now and again… (if I were the devil I’d be whispering the same thing “a little…”🤷‍♂️).

•And this is a big one, first introduced to me in Psyche 101. “Man’s inclination is to avoid pain and seek pleasure”. Anyone out there guilty of this one (even just “a little”).

One thing I picked up on a very long time ago is this: If a person 🤔 let’s say in this case a child, is missing some of the crucial basic necessities from his or her environment, the child (if relatively functional) will adapt or substitute. Now, if you try and take away from that child that which they have come to rely upon in place of… They will likely put up a fight. And of course:

•As adults come we form even more elaborate and complex ways of defending those things…

•In the United States (and in the world) of course there are many many things which not only are own children but we is adults are lacking. So “Papa” (term used in the documentary “Burzynski: The Cancer Cure Cover-up”)… You see, not only do children look around at what’s available to them to substitute… Is a very skimming or crafty or nor knowledgeable adult can put things in the vicinity of this child and they will reach for them. The rat, and the pellet, and the button and the… in a cage. What we learn about human behavior can be used for the benefit of mankind or to exploit it. So, I find it very interesting that in this country with the decline of the family and interpersonal relationships there was an explosion of “things” to ease our anxieties, our emptiness -how else could a system such as our survive without their 1st being a deep deep void! Same as the plight of the Alcoholic/Addict (see model).

SO MY POINT IS THIS -MANY, MANY PEOPLE ARE GOING TO VIEW THESE BLOGS OBJECTIONABLY, DISDAINFULLY, AND WITH BIAS, EVEN PREJUDICE. The whole idea of telling people that what they’re doing is all wrong-has a tendency to go over very badly. Jesus tried it!! A lot of people don’t want a Savior because they don’t want to be saved. 🤷‍♂️ But that doesn’t make the truth of it all any less true -many, many people throughout history, have sought to thwart the truth for numerous reasons (and not just people). I suspected when I signed on for this that there would be few supporters and many, many adversaries (sound familiar -history repeats itself – and people haven’t changed much in the past 6-8,000 years).

Lastly**, I too have my own biases, and prejudices -I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t. But I also appear to be one of those somewhat unique individuals who possess a tad bit more ability to:

•recognize my own bias’ -even admit to some of them

•”You know that Scott Fitzgerald thing about uh, an artist who’s a man, who has two opposing ideas in his head and, you know, he believes in them both simultaneously?” “I heard of it, yeah.” “Well, that’s sort of the beginning of it.” “So, what’s that like, not being anyone in particular?” [From the movie “Edge of Darkness” starring Mel Gibson, Ray Winston, Danny Huston, Bojan Novakovic, Shawn Robert’s. Directed by Martin Campbell (2010)].

My personal answer to the above quote “Very Lonely”. I find that people who believe in something very strongly, even though it may be wrong (or unpopular) tend to have a large or small following -but a following none-the-less! Conversely, people who don’t believe in any particular thing…!

**I don’t think I would be very effective in such a controversial array of subjects without the above-stated facets to my character. I wouldn’t be very good at all at my writing -I would simply be “just another voice in a sea of voices -largest clamoring for their own personal benefit while remaining enslaved to my own personal demons and fears!” – You may or may not agree that people who accept the challenge of stepping forward -share a number of traits in common! That about does it. I hope, with some of you atleast, that I have clarified, if not expelled any preconceived notions! “CONTEMPT(S) PRIOR TO INVESTIGATION”.

Family -Mankind conveniently draws lines on family. He even does so within his own bloodlines in certain instances. Imagine if every time somebody in this world went down we had to go down with them. What a terrifying thought 🤔 “A whole world filled with a people’s who stick to one another’s side thru thick-and-thin!”***

***The more Love’s stock goes up in the world, the more stock in things, money, elitism goes down -and vise versa! (Remember “The Omega Man” ->”Without each other, things matter little”.) The Omega Man (stylized as The Ωmega Man) is a 1971 American post-apocalyptic action film^[3] directed by Boris Sagal and starring Charlton Heston as a survivor of a global pandemic. It was written by John William Corrington and Joyce Corrington, based on the 1954 novel I Am Legend by American writer Richard Matheson. 

When one grows up with an attitude of disdain towards life* -as I apparently did, you can go for a very, very long time missing out on those nuances which make life… which others around you seem to pick up on so effortlessly. It’s those things in an otherwise drab, even cruel world that likely account for “that gleam” in people’s eyes that people like myself could never quite figure out 🤷‍♂️

“If you are sad when life is good (and you are healthy) -what will it be like when life is no longer good, and you no longer possess good health? Enjoy it while it lasts -while you can!”

*It’s all-but-impossible to disdain and appreciate at the same time -and without appreciation, life is simply “drab, even cruel” (and even less). Or, as I heard put in an AA meeting many moons ago “You can’t be sad, and grateful, at the same time”. 🙆‍♂️

When you realize in the moment, “There will never be another moment such as this with those you love…” then you begin to appreciate…

This is our little Miss Daisy, whom we picked out, on a cool Autumn morn in September, 2010 (“September morrrrrn…” ha!), at our local Pic Quik -or rather, she picked us while in her little box with her siblings.

All of about 5 inches long, half a pound (give or take an ounce 🤔), and 2 1/2 – 3 months young “It was love @ first bite”😄. She just turned 11 and looks to be holding up better than us (@ 77 dog years lol). Isn’t she adorable! Brings a tear to my eye when I think “These moments are but fleeting.*

*She’s staying with me for the week while Mama is back east visiting the kids, and grandkids back in Ol’ San Antone -What a treat for both of us! 😁🐕 THANK YOU LORD🙏

•Title taken from “Cherish“, a pop song written by Terry Kirkman and recorded by The Association.^[2] Released in 1966, the song reached number one on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 in September of that year and remained in the top position for three weeks.